i was almost dready mama

oh, hair. it brings with it so much stress, so much heartache, so many decisions to make. [sob] i've only had my hair cut the way i like it...once. in my entire life. by my friend amy. she is my hero. that was nearly three years ago. i've been thinking about getting it dreaded for the past three years or so, and i figured now was the best time. it was long enough so that not much length would be lost, and what with river pulling on it, using it to catch his fall, and to hoist himself up as he climbs me, it seemed like it would be a pretty good choice. plus, i love the way they look. i really think dreads are so beautiful, carefree and fun. i was finally sold.

well, i can’t say i didn’t try. but sometimes, “just going for it” isn’t the best decision. ah, live and learn.

a few weeks ago i was fortunate to attend the dreading day of my friend rachel. for two nights, three friends backcombed her hair into dreadlocks while i snapped shots of the process. the result was forty or so frizzy and lovely new little dreadies. quite a success. i went home and could not contain my excitement regarding the future of my hair. since i had watched rachel’s whole head of hair turn into dreadlocks [and even backcombed a couple, myself.] i realized it didn’t seem that difficult. my impatience got the best of me and i decided to try it on my own. and if didn't work, then it didn’t work. after all, i’d been thinking about it for three years, and that was long enough. and hair is just hair, right?

rachel, getting her hair dreaded.

quite a "dread journey" it has been so far. i started out with one dread. continued with a few more. i thought they were a little too thick, so i began making them thinner, and figured sectioning ahead of time would be a better route to take than try to guess where the next dread would go. turns out, after i gave birth to river, i lost a lot more hair than i thought. sometimes, you’ll hear “oh, it just seems like a lot of hair because you stopped losing hair when you were pregnant.” nope, that’s wrong. for me, at least. see, i did lose hair when i was pregnant. i'm pretty sure just as much as i lost when i wasn’t pregnant. not a big deal, i've always had thick hair. but i actually did lose a ridiculous amount of hair after childbirth –- more than i ever had. i definitely know the difference between losing a normal amount of hair, and losing handfuls at a time. my hair went from a thickness that could barely be contained by a small hair tie, to being thin enough for a hair tie to be wrapped around it four times. 

to make a long story short, i dreaded my hair for hours, i combed them out and combined and re-dreaded and combed them out again, over the course of three days, and came close to tears a couple times. that second night, i literally was lying in bed, awake for two hours [while river was fast asleep, of course] just thinking about my dreads, wondering if they were too thin, too fat, if i would have too few, if they would fall out, if i'd just ruined my hair. it was dreadful [heh!], and i was pretty bitchy mother's day morning. my sections ended up being huge, and my dreads were all different sizes [mostly tiny], and i only had twenty or so. unsatisfied with the results, i ended up taking another three days to undo all the dreads, contacted the friends who had dreaded rachel’s hair, and said, HELP! 

pretty much.

my hair, half-dreaded. the day after 
i had completely dreaded my hair, i started taking them out. [sigh.]

so it’s been a few weeks since i un-dreaded my hair, but i did leave three little dreadies. i have grown quite fond of them. i was planning on getting my hair dreaded for real, but now i'm thinking of waiting. i'd hate to wait longer; i really would love to have a head full of beautiful, tight locks, but i'm afraid it just isn't going to work because of how thin my hair is. but because my hair is so long and so in my way, i am thinking of getting it cut. short. maybe? i will miss my three little dreads that are just kinda hanging out in my hair. [sigh] goodness gracious. hair problems. this will never end.

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